Authors, When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Ask Questions

Curiosity for mindset, approach, results

Photo by Mayur Deshpande on Unsplash.

“Be curious, not judgmental.”
— Walt Whitman

One of my favorite things about coaching is how anyone can use its tools and concepts for better communication in everyday life. Take the practice of curiosity, which serves a dual role in coaching. First, in its unassuming posture, it’s an effective stance from which to explore the unknown.

Second, curiosity provides a template for how to be with others — authentic, interested, and present rather than judgmental. A coach, from curiosity, asks open-ended questions of a client not to interrogate, correct, or analyze, but to provoke a client’s own wisdom and discovery.

Where am I going with this? When writing, publishing, and authorhood are hard and not going our way, when we get rejected, feel dejected, are deep in time- or financial debt, it is sooo easy to judge the industry, berate reviewers, curse bookstore owners, and then turn the critical attitude on ourselves. Curiosity, detached and genuinely interested, is a great neutralizer when all is clouded by harshness.

Curiosity is also a preventative, a preemptive guard against descending into negative judgments. Use its generous attitude about yourself and with others…